


Its Okay

by DerekHaleGirl97



Series: Girl!Stiles [11]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Always Female Stiles Stilinski, Angst with a Happy Ending, Depressed Derek Hale, Derek Hale Deserves Nice Things, Established Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, F/M, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Sad Derek Hale, The Hale Family (Teen Wolf) Lives, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-14
Updated: 2019-04-14
Packaged: 2020-01-13 03:43:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18460763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DerekHaleGirl97/pseuds/DerekHaleGirl97
Summary: Derek didn’t hit rock bottom until three years after he married Stiles.





	Its Okay

Derek didn’t hit rock bottom until three years after he married Stiles. His life sucked and he had shitty luck. He killed his first girlfriend because his uncle was a manipulative asshole. His second girlfriend, Kate, burned his entire family alive, leaving him, Peter, and Laura as the only ones who survived. Then, years later, Laura dies because Peter became power hungry. Kate made a return and continued to torment him for a while. The only stable thing he had going for him was Stiles.  
She was annoying, bratty, and reckless sixteen-year-old who got on his nerves and always hung around when she wasn’t wanted. They didn’t trust each other, almost hated each other, but she never turned around to stab Derek in the back. Eventually, that hate grew to tolerance, which grew to reluctant friendships, then to something more. It was nice, finally having someone who wasn’t out to destroy him and all he cared about. Stiles pushed him to be better, challenged him, made him rethink his snap-decisions before he hurled himself into the next threat.  
Stiles made him better, and he couldn’t help but love her for it. That and her nerdiness made her more adorable.  
That’s why he married her after she graduated from college. Things had calmed down enough for the pack to finally relax. Stiles became a sheriff’s deputy and Derek worked on architecture. Their lives were peaceful for those three years. They talked about babies but never decided on anything. Derek wanted to build a house for them, even planned on showing Stiles the blueprints he made for it on their anniversary. But then she died…   
Gerard’s minions were still around, trying to create havoc for the pack again. Most of it he and Scott were able to handle, but then one of the hunters set up a nasty trap and Malia got caught during one of her nightly runs. Derek, Scott, and Stiles went out to help her. Scott got her out of the trap while Stiles and Derek took care of the hunters. He just took his eyes off her for one second while he chased away most of them. Derek didn’t notice that there was one hiding in the trees until it was too late.  
He heard the whoosh of air, Stiles calling out for him, then a sickening wet thud. At first, he thought the arrow had hit him. When the pain didn’t come, he turned to see the arrow had embedded itself into Stiles’ stomach. They both just stood there, looking at each other in shock. Stiles looked down, then back as her breathing became labored.   
“That’s unfortunate…” Then she collapsed.   
Derek rushed to her, taking her in his arms. He couldn’t take out the arrow or else she would bleed to death. Behind him, Scott and Malia were taking care of the last hunter, so his whole focus was on her. She gagged and whimpered, trying to hide the pain that she was obviously feeling.  
“Don’t,” was all Derek could say. “Please, don’t.”  
“It’s okay,” Stiles assured him, her voice was shaking and weak. He’s never heard her sound so weak before. It wasn’t right. “Der, it’s going to be okay.”  
“Stiles- I can’t- I can’t,” he nearly sobs, bringing her closer.  
“I love you,” her breath was hallowing like she was struggling to breathe.  
“I love you too,” He pressed his lips to her hair, closing his eyes to fight back the unwanted tears.  
Stiles passed then, and he didn’t get to see her close her eyes. Despite the arrow, she looked like she could have been sleeping in his arms. Like she would if it were a movie night and she had dozed off.   
Again, Derek had lost everything.  
What was worse was that he didn’t feel anything afterward. With Paige, all he felt was guilt. If she hadn’t met him, she could still be alive today and living her dream as a successful cello player. With his family, there was guilt too and also self-loathing because if it weren’t for him he’d still have a family. Laura would still be alive and Peter wouldn’t have lost his mind.   
With Stiles? He just felt numb. There wasn’t anything left for him to feel anymore. He had used up all his emotions and was just running on auto piolet at this point. And that wasn’t fair to Stiles because she deserved so much more than that. She deserved to have him cry over her because she made him feel alive again. Not this emotional void.  
Stiles was the last good thing he had, and now she was just… gone. Like everything else.  
After the funeral, Derek did try to move on. He always did even when he didn’t feel like it. Six months after Stiles found him trying to drink his way through the east coast. Nothing worked, but if he played the part of the broken widow then maybe he could move past it. He didn’t, of course. There was still guilt, and agony, and anger. Nothing he did could help him move past the gaping hole in his chest, leaving him in a zombie-like state.   
Sometimes, he just wanted to end it all. Finally, be at peace and be with his family again, be with Stiles again. But, he knew it wasn’t right. It was torture to wait for death to come, but there wasn’t much else he can do… unless… 

Derek returned to Beacon Hills on the day he married Stiles. He didn’t talk to anyone or say why he was back. He just went straight to Deaton at the clinic he still owned.  
“Derek,” the old man was genuinely surprised to see him. “What brings you here?”  
“I need your help,” Derek leaned against the counter.  
“With?”  
“I…” He sucked in a deep breath, rubbing his thumb against the ring he could never bring himself to take off. “I want to bring Stiles-”  
“Derek, you know that can’t be done,” Deaton crossed his arms. “To bring her back is to mess with the laws of nature itself. I know you loved her, but she has had her time. Let her rest.”  
“Not like that,” Derek shook his head. He knew what bringing her back would mean. He’s seen what it’s done to Peter, and even worse, Kate. “I want to fix everything. I want to prevent the fire, Paige, everything.”  
“You mean…” Deaton considered his words. “Going back in time? That’s impossible.”  
“It’s difficult,” Derek corrected, “but not impossible.”  
“Derek, you can’t change the past.”  
“Then what future do I have?” Derek’s fist clenched.  
“Stiles helped you once,” he reminded him. “Surely you can find that again.”  
“You know I’ll just do it anyway.” Derek tried to ignore the aching in his chest. “With or without your help.”  
Deaton watched him for a moment, observing before he let out a heavy sigh.  
“Okay, I’ll help.”

Derek and Deaton were at the Nemeton, preparing for the spell Deaton managed to find in one of his tomes. He drew intricate lines over the rings of the stump while Derek placed candles and dug a hole near the roots. Deaton burned some herbs into ash, then took out a white feather from his bag. He turned to Derek once the full moon was at its zenith in the sky.  
“Are you ready?”  
Derek nodded, going over to the hole he made with the items he planned on using as a sacrifice. Deaton had explained thoroughly that for this to work, Derek would need to give up the things with the most value to him.  
The first item that went in was the last photo he had of his parents. It was chared and ruined from the fire with faded colors and crease lines. Next was Laura’s keys to her Camaro. He got rid of most of her stuff, but he could never part with her car key. It was the last present she got for her birthday before the fire. Lastly came his and Stiles’ wedding rings. When Derek left, John took most of Stiles’ things back home. Derek wondered if John had placed them in her old room or if it became part of the stuff he had from his wife. How lonely that must be to only have memories in an empty house.  
Once all the items were inside, Derek filled the hole with ashes of the burnt wood of his old home. Then, he covered it with dirt and Deaton began to chant.  
The Nemeton is supposed to absorb the energy Derek gave into the items, then use it to create a link between the past and present. This was Derek’s only shot and there was no going back for him.  
Deaton completed the spell and for a moment, Derek thought it didn’t work. Then, he started to feel weird, his head running in circles as he collapsed onto the foot of the Nemeton. The last thing he hears before drifting off is Stiles’ voice.   
It’s okay…

Derek woke up with a headache. All of his memories were rushing back to him, and it hurt to relive them all in a span of seconds. For a second time, Derek didn’t believe that the spell worked until he opened his eyes and found himself in his childhood room. The walls were the same faded blue, with posters of bands and movies hanging on them. His furniture was where he had it before, even his bedspread was the same checkered pattern he hated so much.  
Derek rose from bed, making his way downstairs to see his Mom in the kitchen. His Mom, alive and humming Selena under her breath as she made breakfast. Cora is there too, nine and happily drawing crude images with her crayons. Laura came from behind him, shoving him out of the way and ruffling his hair like she always did.  
“Move out of the way, runt,” Laura laughed as she made her way to the kitchen.  
“Laura,” His Mom scolded, turning from the eggs to frown at her daughter. “You know better than to call your brother names.”  
Laura shrugged, then stole a toast from the plate sitting on the table.  
Derek was still in shock, taking in the scene of it all.  
Talia turned around to get a good look at her son. “Hun, do you want eggs?”  
He couldn’t help himself. Derek just sped to her and wrapped his arms around her waist, burying his face into her shoulder. There he was welcomed with the scent of home, warmth, comfort, and Alpha. Things he had longed for but could never have again.  
“Der? What’s wrong sweetie?” His mother soothed, running her hand on his back.  
“Uh, I had a bad dream,” A really bad dream.   
“Oh, my baby boy,” Talia wrapped her arms around him, squeezing him tight. “It’s just a dream. Nothing to worry about.”  
“Mama’s boy,” Laura scoffed under her breath, but Derek could hear her. Somehow, he didn’t mind.  
He was just happy to have his family back.

Derek took the second chance and made sure nothing went wrong this time around. He left Paige alone even though he loved her once. She was better off without him, anyway.   
He kept his eye out for Kate, and when she did show up, he ignored her advances and told his Mom that she was harassing him. Talia made it clear to Kate that if she ever tried to mess with her family, she would surely have that pretty face disfigured. Kate still tried to set the house on fire, but with a previously called sheriff who was informed of the situation, managed to prevent the fire from getting worse. Kate was put away for what would be the rest of her life.  
Derek met Stiles again after he applied to be a deputy at the sheriff’s station. This time, she was eighteen going on nineteen. She was still fiercely protective of her Dad, and it seemed like the only worry she had was passing a semester at college. Unlike before, she and Derek hit it off almost instantly. They both had a love for literature and classic horror movies, and it was nice. No life and death situations, no monsters trying to kill them at every turn. It was the way it was supposed to be.

Five years later, Derek would propose to her again and she would say yes, again.

**Author's Note:**

> Don't have much to say. Kudos and Comments are appreciated.


End file.
